Friday, March 17, 2017

Moving Along

Took me pretty much the whole week, this week to get up the energy to write a post. I'm on the soft food portion of the program right now and it's very hard to introduce new foods. 

It seems yogurt, protein drinks are good, but when I eat anything with any texture is when I run into trouble. Scrambled eggs for breakfast, I mush them with a fork and then chew them like they are a piece of steak, lol and it still feels like it's stuck in my throat. It took most of the week to get anything other than liquid down, but I'm finally accepting the eggs and I've even introduced ground up chicken salad for dinner. 

It's so hard to believe that just one little quarter cup of food, sometimes less, completely fill my stomach. I still can't quite wrap my head around it. 

So, I'm gonna continue on with similar foods over the weekend and then next week I'll try to introduce tuna and fish and see where that gets me. 

Much love to all,
Jodi

Current weight: 265lbs
Weight loss so far: 21lbs
Day 9

Wednesday, March 8, 2017

Steady As I Go

Start of week two and finally feeling a bit better. Getting used to this new stomach is hard. It's hard to decide if the pain you are feeling is just pain from healing or if you are actually hungry, because hunger pains actually hurt when your stomach is the size of a banana.

I ventured out once to the craft store and had Hubby drive me, which ended up being a good thing because in the middle of the store I started to sweat and thought I might pass out. Guess it might have been too soon. I just want to get on with it. Patience is definitely not a strong personality trait of mine.

For the first few days I questioned whether this surgery was a good decision and now 8 days later, I realize everything is gonna be okay. I've gotten more in tune with the sensations in my throat and stomach and getting a little better at deciding whether I'm hungry or just thirsty.

Looking forward to Friday as I start the soft food diet. Actual food, can't wait!

Current Weight: 273 lbs.

Much Love, Jodi

Thursday, March 2, 2017

Just Hanging in There

It's day three since the surgery. The first night was spend in the hospital, so they can keep an eye on you and make sure there are no issues. They encourage walking the halls and to get moving. I started walking within the first hour after getting to my room and didn't let up hoping it would move this gas along.

Yesterday and today aren't the best days I'll remember in my life, that's for sure. The incisions, there are five of them across my belly, are just a tad tender, but mostly what hurts is the gas they pump into your stomach during the surgery. They do this in order to have room to move around inside and do what they need to do. But, let me just say this, it is beyond uncomfortable, they tell you, you will experience some discomfort. Naah, it's painful and it doesn't go away quickly. The pain gets caught up under your ribs, in your chest and now I seem to have a very bad heartburn on top of it all.

I know each day will be better, as today is better than yesterday, so I really can't wait for Friday, LOL

It's really hard to get the liquids into your body like they want you to. I'm supposed to be drinking 4 ounces of this berry protein mix, three times a day and add water in between. I'm trying but I'm lucky so far to have gotten down 8 ounces of anything. The key is to stay hydrated, I'm working on it.


I've attached a photo of my lovely belly for you all to see (Don't look Ethel), just so you can have an idea of what the incisions look like. I know it looks like a big ass or a pregnant belly, sorry about that. Hubby asked if I was trying to discourage people from having this operation by posting the pic, lol No, I'm not, I just want you to be prepared for the surgery, that's all, so you will be hearing about and seeing all of it.

Much Love, Jodi

Current weight 286 lbs


Monday, February 20, 2017

Countdown Has Begun

Surgery day is exactly 9 days from now and I've noticed that I've become a bit emotional. At first, just stupid things were going wrong and I was having a bad day. Today, my computer wouldn't print for me and then when I got it to print, it was out of ink. Needless to say this did not go over well with me! Hubby of course, got the wrath of it, like somehow it was his fault.

Well, I think I figured out what's going on with me. I thought I was fine and just impatient to get this show on the road but to be honest, I think I am in mourning. As I say that, the tears are running down my face. Seems like a stupid thing, but when you've spent the majority of your adult life eating whatever you wanted, it's very strange to think about no longer being able to do that.

I definitely know the surgery is the best thing I can do for myself, and in no way am I having second thoughts, but just knowing that I can't eat pizza, or ice cream or just steak and potatoes, definitely feels like a loss. I'm sure if I psychoanalyzed myself, I'd discover that food was probably a very good friend, if not my best friend. It's always been there for me when I was sad, or depressed, or lonely, so why wouldn't I be upset about losing it?

I'm guessing that once I have the surgery and start seeing the results, the loss of my favorite foods will be less painful. I definitely prepared for this and I think in the back of my mind I knew I would feel this way, so like everything else, I'll face it, deal with it and move on.

We'll talk again soon…
Much Love, Jodi

Starting Weight: 293 lbs

Monday, February 13, 2017

The Killing of Jennifer



I haven't written in my blog for so long, I'm sure most of you had forgotten I even had one. I guess as my weight has gotten out of hand, my energy and motivation have also gone by the wayside. This series of posts will be getting much more personal, well at least emotionally, as I will be writing about my weight loss process in the hopes it might help someone else with similar struggles. The last two years have been a real wake up call for me and I've finally accepted that it's time, time to rid myself of Jennifer.

They say when you are my size, which is now pushing 300lbs, that it's like carrying an extra person around with you. That's where Jennifer comes in—she's my plus one. I've loved her and nurtured her for years now. I've fed her cupcakes and ice cream and indulged her when she begged for cheese fries. Even though I knew to give in to her was only going to hurt the both of us in the end. And here we are on the cusp of weight loss surgery because of "her" addictions.

Of course I joke about Jennifer not being any help at all. The least the girl could do is help around the house once in a while. Maybe pull out the vacuum occasionally or "Bitch can you wash a dish?" but the truth is, it's all me. It's me that has terrible eating habits. I skip breakfast. Sometimes I eat lunch, but mostly I'll eat one meal a day and by the time I realize I haven't eaten all day, I'm starving. I'm starving generally means whatever I choose to eat at this point is an overindulgence. Either I eat the wrong thing (something fried, something cheesy) or I eat to much. It's a vicious cycle. Of course all my body knows is that it needs to hold on to whatever nutrition I've consumed because it has no idea when the next meal will come.

I believe this is a problem with most overweight people, especially women. I always say I "forget" to eat. Yeah, I know, I can hear you saying "Honey, from the looks of you, I doubt you've ever forgotten a meal, maybe you're just not remembering right" It is true though, I get involved in my work or social media (I can watch kitten and puppy videos for hours on end) and simply don't realize how much time has passed until, well, it's dinnertime. Oops! Over years and years of doing this, your body just stays in a dormant state and refuses to let go of the fat it needs to survive. Now add my age, I'm almost 60 and lack of exercise and there you have it, the voluptuous beauty of me.

So, I've been contemplating writing to you about all of this for a while now, ever since I decided this surgery was going to happen. I have gotten all my medical clearances completed, attended all my appointments with the nutritionist and my surgery date is set for February 28th. So if you're curious enough to follow along with me, I'll be making regular posts to let you know how everything is going. I'm hoping I can hold on to my humor through the pain and suffering and give you a laugh or two. So please feel free to comment, encourage or to just say "hello".

Here we go...


Monday, December 24, 2012

A REDNECK CHRISTMAS EVE

Twas da nat ‘efore Christmas, an da party was slammin’
We was hangin’ n’ singin’, man, we was a jammin’
Suddenly I hears a bang-bang on da door’,
must a hit perdy hard cause it vibrated da floor’.


I opened da door. Just a crack—I was scurd.
Beside all da bangin, day ain’t said a word.
Low and behold what do I see? Ole drunkin’ Santa takin' a pee!


It wunt really Santa, he’s up da firehouse
Was ole cousin Bubba, come to party da house.
Da moonshine he brung was a perdy good gift,
It was sho gonna give us all a good lift.


So I’s went to da baffroom, in da tub fer a beer
and all of a sudd’n what did I hear?
A clangin’ and racket took me a lookin’
out da winda to see what ole Mama was cookin’


I sees her a waddlin toward that old pot
filled up with grease and o’boy was it hot!
She’s a fixin to fry a big turkey, looks like.


Oh, my, my Lord, I just can’t believe it
If she puts that bird in dare. she gone get lit!
I got’s to get steppin, move as fast as I can
Oh no! “Mama don’t put da bird in da pan!"


To late, she done did it, and boy did she fly
Don’t think I see’d anyone go quite dat high!
She flew right past Santa and all his reindeer,
da turkey was dare too, takin’ up da rear.


Hey Ya’ll! Come on out here an’ look over yonder
I think Mama just took out Rudolph and Donder!
Oh well, she be back. She’s been thew worse
Hell, last year she got knocked out by Earl’s kickin’ horse.


When she gits back though, she’ll open her presents
and see what we got her is far better than last ens.
We thought maybe Mama could use a good rest
So we bought her a Snuggie, we heard they’s da best
It'll be keepin’ her a warm thew a cold winter’s nat
just in case she gits a hankrin’ for another nats flight!





Merry Christmas Ya’ll —Jodi