Proud Member of the Volupuous Club Since 2003

The more you get to know me, the more you will find I have a tendency to be somewhat politically incorrect. I poke fun at everything and everyone—including myself. Some would like to say I do this to feel better about myself, bullshit! I feel just fine about myself. I'm overweight, menopausal and old—life does this to you. I think for the most part I am fairly satisfied with my personality and my perspective on life. Good or bad, my friends know if they want the truth... I'm there for them—always. The overweight thing does bother me, and my "change of life cycle" (oh, God, I can't believe I just called it my "change of life", I sound like my mother!) has made me realize that I better start embracing my curves cause the skinny fairy ain't showing up anytime soon! It took me a while to realize how "big" I really had become. I felt skinny inside, so every time I passed a mirror or glass window and saw my reflection I was always shocked. For some reason I expected to see a 120lb woman standing there and instead I saw what I refer to, as a unrecognizable weeblewobble! There were lots of signs that I had now become a member of the more volupuous club. I think the first real indication was when an acquaintance of mine, who was, at the time, twice my size—linked me in a statement referring to us as "girls "OUR" size! I was floored, are you kidding me? Since then I have discovered many signs that confirmed my bigness. I found out my huge behind could do tricks! One night as I was getting out of the shower, apparently I had closed the shower curtain behind me and was bending over to towel myself off. As I stood up and walked toward the mirror across the room I was abruptly stopped by the shower curtain that had gotten caught in my butt crack, "hey, look Ma, no hands" I fell on the floor laughing, I could barely stop long enough to explain to hubby what happened.

Another time I realized the weight had gotten out of hand was while shopping for clothes, I could no longer choose my size right off the rack. I had to painstakingly try every single thing on, nothing fit or looked right. All I could see were all the rolls of fat indicated in every item I pulled and maneuvered onto my frame. And someone please explain to me, if horizontal stripes make you look wider, why the hell does everything in the "big girl" store have horizontal stripes!! Oh, and just a foot note, just because they make it in your size, doesn't mean you are supposed to be wearing it, leather pants are not sexy on a size 16!

Well, like I said, I'm starting to come to terms with the fact that I might just remain this size for the remainder of my life—cause ya know, that ice cream surely isn't going to eat itself.

Much Love to my Big Proud Sista's—Jodi